Terrance, Aaron, Chelsie, and Makayla
Hrmm. Umm. Writing a diary is like riding a bicycle, right?
Hmmm.
I guess if you don't ride a bicycle for a while it might be a little awkward at first. So maybe the analogy works. Hopefully it will get easier.
Of course it doesn't help that my first diary in so long consists of me begging for money. It feels kinda wrong. I dunno, maybe it is. But if it is wrong, it's the kind of wrong you have to do anyway because you have to try. I can't tell them I tried when I didn't.
And wow, now I think my privilege is showing. I'm complaining about writing a diary when they don't have a home. So yeah, enough hand-wringing. Let's get to it.
(Here is the link to the GoFundMe page I set up for their family. Most of the following content is also posted there.)
Note: I don't know their whole story, just bits and pieces, so I won't try to tell it. Instead, I'll tell the story of our encounters as I remember them. I have been given permission to provide the information contained herein.
We met 7 year-old Makayla and her mom, Chelsie, while walking to get groceries. They were sitting in the grass with a couple of carts and some cardboard signs. (Chelsie said later that after being ignored for some time, Makayla told her that nobody cares about them. I can't even imagine.) They needed help. We offered to buy them some groceries while at the store and asked what they could use. Chelsie told us she would be happy with anything we wanted to get her.
While getting groceries, we decided to set them up at the motel down the street. She gratefully accepted. They gathered up their belongings and we started walking. Along the way she told us that her son had been staying at a friend's house and her partner was off to get him. A family of four.
We talked while waiting for the attendant. Chelsie said that she should hear back from the shelter on Wednesday. I told her that we could cover the motel until then and I gave her my phone number just in case. She told me that I could call the room as well if I wanted to follow up. Once the attendant returned we secured a room for the family and said goodbye.
The next day I called to make sure everything was going okay and to check in on their food situation. Terrance, Chelsie's partner, told me that they had very little left but that he was going to see what he could come up with. I offered to take them shopping after work so they would have enough to last until Wednesday.
We met at the motel and I finally got to meet Terrance and Aaron in person. It was then decided that Terrance and I should go shopping together. We talked quite a bit while filling up the cart. The first thing he wanted to discuss was employment. Terrance is eager to get back to work and says he has a lot of experience in warehouse/shipping environments. Sadly I can't help much in this regard due to being relatively new to the area, not being in management, and my employer not currently hiring at that position.
We covered a number of other topics. First and foremost, Terrance stressed that their biggest concern is for the well-being Aaron and Makayla. This is why they left what they felt was a bad situation and why they are focused right now on getting into a stable, long-term shelter. Once Terrance feels that his family is secure, he will be better equipped to search for employment.
Even though I already knew the answer, I confirmed that they use government assistance programs like SNAP. Unfortunately, it is simply not enough for them right now due to their homeless situation. They are also able to take advantage of programs which allow them to place the children in good schools. According to Terrance, Makayla even has to wear a uniform. They take their children’s education seriously.
Finally, I asked Terrance if there was anything else he would like to say to those who may donate. He told me that he would love to be in a position someday to help others just as he's been helped.
Today, they found out that the spot at the family shelter was taken. I booked them the motel for a few more nights, but of course this is not sustainable. We talked for a while about their plans. They do have access to subsidies for housing and are looking for an apartment. Unfortunately, this is an uphill battle for them for a number of reasons. Between them they have several evictions and a substantial amount of debt related to housing. But they are searching for a place that will accept them with the resources they have been provided. (As an aside, if there is anybody willing to give them a shot in the Portland area, please let me know. Chelsie says they have both completed the Rent Well class.) They are also on the wait list for a number of long-term family shelters. They are trying to avoid emergency shelters because of bad experiences (lice, theft, violence, etc.) in the recent past.
They also mentioned that they have started to look at employment opportunities in the area. They are hopeful that something will pan out.
We talked a while longer about a number of things, some of them not so pleasant. Terrance has a felony conviction related to stolen property. Chelsie says that he was lied to about the nature of the property, but it didn’t matter as it was his name that was on the pawn slip. In any case, he lost his job and spent some time in prison. Obviously this makes finding employment more difficult.
They have some family in the area, but they do not provide much assistance for various reasons that I am not going to get into.
Chelsie also has a cigarette habit that she is trying to break. She says she has already cut back substantially and is getting help for this.
I told her that I appreciated her honesty and asked her if I could post this information. She agreed. She did say that there was more but that she wasn’t ready to discuss it with me. I told her that was fine. Honestly, I don’t feel that I’m in a position to judge. I just want to provide as much information to would-be donors as possible.
Terrance wanted me to add that while they have been together for 10 years, they never married. Once they find some stability they plan to do just that.
To end the story on a happier note, I invited their family to come with my son and me to the zoo this weekend. We’re going on Saturday.
Odds and ends
Funds raised will be used for anything the family may need (food, clothing, hygiene products, toys?, etc.) and possibly an extended stay at a motel if a decent shelter doesn't come through soon. (Unfortunately we live in an apartment and don't have any space to offer them.) I will track how the funds are used and post photos of receipts to the GoFundMe page.
If you are worried about the donations making it to the family… all I can say is that you’ll have to trust me. I have a posting history, so feel free to check it out. I think you will find that I’m sincere and do not have a history of asking for money (aside from raising awareness about charities). Perhaps there are even some old-timers around that can vouch for me.
I also understand that there are some who may not be comfortable with this kind of giving. There are plenty of charities doing great work which deserve our support. This is just a situation where I feel, well, responsible. This family is a part of my life now and I have this drive to do everything in my power to help them succeed. If you want to be a part of that and have the means, please consider giving a little. If you don’t have the means but still want to help, you can share this story with your friends.
I will stay in contact with the family as long as possible. With their permission I will also share status updates here and on the GoFundMe page.
Finally, those who donate should know that GoFundMe does charge a fee. Using this platform means that 8-9% of a typical donation will be deducted. I will add my own money (up to a reasonable amount) so that they get the fundraising total. If we somehow manage to raise more than the goal the extra may still go to them. However, if for some reason there is some left over after their needs are taken care of, I will donate it to a local food pantry. I would hope it goes without saying, but this fundraiser will not benefit myself or my family in any way.
Disclaimer: I do not have the means to vet Chelsie and Terrance's claims. It's always possible that they are not being completely truthful. That being said, I haven’t had any reason to suspect dishonesty.